Greetings, readers! Today begins a new feature on Lasken's Log, in which I post an original theory or meditative essay each morning. I will try to come up with lively essays that, even if you're having the worst morning of your life, will give you a little something. I will post by 5am (West Coast time), so you can make Lasken's Theory of the Day part of your morning routine! Bookmark this page now and start the day right!
Live long and perspire! Doug Lasken
Theory #1, posted 6/14/23
We often say that, "All power tends to corrupt and absolute power corrupts absolutely," as if it were a given, perhaps because the statement's author was John Emerich Edward Dalberg-Acton, aka Lord Acton, 1st Baron, 13th Marquess of Groppoli and Deputy Lieutenant of the Royal Victorian Order, and maybe also because the statement sounds true. It may be true, but my theory is that, in addition to corrupting, power enslaves the powerful, because in order to achieve power one must please some people- not everybody- but the right people. Absolute power would entail absolutely pleasing these people, with the result that the powerful person is in fact a slave. Corruption, then, can be defined as the subservience of the self to someone else. It is corrupt to deny yourself absolutely.
Theory #2, posted 6/15/23
Our five senses of sight, smell, taste, hearing and touch are geared to the human time setting. We might define this setting as one in which, if you observe a human clock, you can see the minute hand move but not the other two. In another setting, all three hands might be zipping around too fast to see or stuck in place for thousands of years. Science figures out things that we formerly couldn't see due to the limitations of our time setting, for instance scientists figured out that mountains move. We couldn't see them move because mountains move too slowly for our setting. The physical evidence took scientists beyond the human time setting, and they saw that mountains are crashing into the Earth or thrusting out of it even as we watch. Physicists broke through in the other direction to superfast realms when they used lasers to view photosynthesis. In the course of recording very fast processes, they detected the creation of particles which last such an incredibly short time that their lifespan can only be measured in nanoseconds (billionths of a second). Such particles are termed "virtual" because they are so short-lived that we're not sure they're real. Could we not imagine, though, that in their own time setting virtual particles may last millions of subjective years? We too, in relative terms, are short-lived, our entire life-span come and gone in a flash from the POV of an infinite universe. In this sense humans are virtual. If we extend beyond our time setting we can see more, and perhaps be more.
Theory #3, posted 20 minutes later
This is an idea for the youth of Hong Kong about what you should do now. It's clear you're on a binary course: either you will confront a dragon that will kill and eat you, or you will likely float like ghosts to safer havens where, although you will be part ghost and less real, you will gain access to other time settings, and that will help you. By "float like ghosts" I mean drop your physical protests, suddenly, without warning, then float like ghosts into bureaucracies and civic organizations, as we did in the face of our wars, so that now we float like ghosts in our huddled havens, wondering how long the power will stay on. I'm just saying, you'll last longer.
Theory #4, posted 6/16/23
I apologize to readers: I have no theories this morning. My head is empty of content, even after drinking coffee, staring at online images, letting my dog Franklin out, letting him in and feeding him, walking out front again into the dark moon dawn and picking up the paper, scowling at its cover as Franklin monitors me for signs of life. At times like this I rely on the dictionary for wisdom; I found this: "Theory derives from Greek theoria: 'contemplation,' 'speculation,' from theoros, 'spectator.'" So if you have a theory then you are a spectator witnessing something happen, suggesting that a theory is not only a concept, it is an event. It could be that if you don't have any theories it's because nothing is happening. Maybe Friday, June 16, 2023 is itself not happening; it might just be a reflection of yesterday, with a yearning towards tomorrow. This will have to do as today's theory.
Theory #5, posted 6/17/23
Tonight is new moon- the dark of the moon- said by obstetric nurses to be the most powerful moon phase in terms of inducing births. Let's do a test to determine if moon phases affect human behavior. It looks like The End is Near, for a change. Keep track of moon phases and see if you detect causal relationships with up or downticks in the Apocalypse, and if you think of a practical purpose to this, let me know.
6/18/23:
6am: Theories are illusions. I have no theories about anything.
9:35am: Horoscope for Capricorn: Shut up and go back to sleep.
11:45am: This ends my attempt to write an inspiring theory every morning.
